Today I experienced the joys of Fathers Day for the very first time, and I must say it gives me a warm feeling of purpose. Writing about it gives me a sense of trepidation though, and I’ll explain why in a moment.
As I write this, my nearly nine week old son is sitting in his bouncer with a case of the hiccups and is happily surveying the world around him in the way only a baby can; his bright blue eyes are open wide and he is gawping around at everything that is within his limited vision. I assume he has limited vision – he hasn’t quite managed to fix his gaze on his mother or me yet, apart from the limited attempts when he is hungry and believes that looking more adorable is his key to being fed upon demand.
As I have explained to friends over the last few weeks, it wasn’t until he arrived that I realised how selfish I had been with my own time. I’d been used to sitting and futzing around on the internet for hours at a time, convincing myself that I was working or researching or doing whatever I needed to fulfil my dream of supporting myself (I was lying to myself – I was just reading different bits of the internet). Now my time is broken up into whatever chunks are available between Freddie needing to be fed, or have his nappy changed, or whatever attendance he needs to keep him happy, and whatever time I can eke out to just sit and bond with him.
Part of the time has been increasingly allocated to expanding my writing skills. Today is day 266 of writing 500 words a day. As I explained in my previous post, I have been doing this as an exercise in improving my writing skills, but because the writing isn’t public I am increasingly turning it into a whingey diary. I thought it was necessary to give myself a kick in the arse by committing to writing openly.
So I’ve taken a step and have decided to publish 500 words on this site every day for the next 30 days. The 500 words will be those I write as my daily exercise. This fills me with trepidation as I am about to make my inner mutterings public, and it also requires me to apply a filter to what I write now, lest I offend someone.
This explanatory post is the first of my 500 words a day. I offer no guarantees as to the quality of my writing – often as it is not planned but simply written straight out as I think of a topic in the morning. I edit very little, and plan even less. If I were to try and apply edits and careful planning I fear I would run out of time, and I have already committed to the writing for 266 days in a row – I’m not about to stop that streak.
So, enjoy what you read, and expect more every day. Let’s see what the next 30 days bring.